Thursday, March 01, 2007

What A Beautiful Mess I'm In

Hectic crazy life! WAH! (Lately I've been saying "waah." It's less of a whine and more of a me acknowledging how annoying and whiny I'm being. :)

So, I was sitting in class, not paying attention - as so often happens and I calculate the amount of my time not occupied by necessary obligations (and running!), and I came up with 13 hours a week. That is 13 hours to do GOBS of homework, get dressed, clean, and attempt to have any fun social life whatsoever. 13 measly little hours a week. "Not fair!" I say. But, I guess it feels good that I am spending lots of time "awakening my consciousness" and not constantly succumbing to our default setting of laziness.

I had an Existentialist Philosophy exam today, and I find the concepts absolutely fascinating. Nietzsche's challenges to Christianity and his implications on the individual and collective potential of humankind are honestly riveting. It seems as though the threads of learning in my various classes are so intertwined, it is making for a fantastic semester. It makes sense that as we become more and more absorbed in a world of television, technology, celebrities, and general noise - the more we move away from pursuing the things that matter, the things that drive us and awaken us. Okay, I must stop crapping along. Who'd ever have guessed that I'd be blathering about philosophy? ME? But I freaking love this stuff.

Sooo, remember how my eye looked sooo nasty a few days ago? Well I went into a dining hall (because I'm a secret shopper, not like I'd chose to eat nasty, overpriced food) to get a sandwich. I approached the counter and the exchange went something like:
Ricky: Oh my GOD! What happened to you?!?!?
Me: Um, uh.....OH! My eye?
Ricky: YES! What the...what? [yes, apparently, I was so grotesque I took his breath away.]
Me: Oh, it's not a big deal. It's called episcleritis. [why oh why did I feel the need to explain this to the deli guy?] It means I have a tear on the sclera of my eye...Yes, the scelra...The white part...
Ricky: Oh wow. Okay, honey. What you want me to make you? I'll make you anything you want.
Other deli guy: Anything she wants? You mean you'd make her a peanut butter and jelly sandwich if she wanted it? [Apparently, peanut butter and jelly is a Big Deal, yo.]
Ricky: Baby, you want a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, I'ma make it for you.
Me: Wow, thanks. But you know what, I think I'm just gonna stick with a veggie sandwich...

Was he hitting on me? Why would I want a PB and J? Did he pity my demon eye? Maybe it was fear. Probably fear.

Last Thursday, I had a Human Sexuality Exam, so after waking up at 7am on Thursday - I realized I had lost the study guide. Now, I had not cracked the book for the class, so the study guide was really going to be my saving grace. So, crap...what do you do? Call an acquaintance you barely know at 7:30am (how cruel am I!?), wake her and take her study guide! I was soon studying happily in Starbucks, when I realized there is no real way to study the subject in public without feeling strange. Here I was, among all the stay-at-home moms with their toddlers, the business men with laptops and in meetings, and the retired couples and friends...with my book open to LARGE pictures of...ahem...male and female reproductive parts. REAL PICTURES. I sort of studied with the book half closed, so as not to draw the suspicion of any wandering eyes. (Starbucks can be a very friendly place. More than once someone has struck up a conversation with me about what I'm studying...) But then, I realized the front cover was questionably worse, showing a blurry picture of a naked couple embracing. So no matter what, I'm gonna look like a pervert. That's when I decided to stick to my study guide. :)

Mike and I also got into a debate over Starbucks last week. :) He sees no redeeming qualities in it whatsoever, to which I maintain: social responsibility! biggest purchaser of fair trade coffee! great worker treatment and benefits! and other such reasons! to assuage my conscience as I sip a tall, organic milk, caramel macchiato...or latte...or sugar free Cinnamon Dulce...or cappuccino. Dear God, I am addicted. Support group?

PS:
Also, if you can - watch The Corporation - a really well-made, informational, provocative film. And responsible for me swearing of all rBGH milk; because, DUDES, that shit has caused cancer in lab rats and is banned in all developed countries EXCEPT THE U.S. Seriously wrong.

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